Senate Judiciary Approves Sotomayor

Sotomayor has been approved by the Senate Judiciary Committee to be the first Hispanic justice! Oh, noes.

True, only one Republican voted for her. Seeing as he hails from SC, we can forgive him pandering to the growing population of Hispanics in his state. What’s a person of conservative values to do? Votes over values, my friends. This is politics!

I’m just sittin’ here imagining the horrors that will be bestowed upon this great nation when empathy is brought to the bench. And not just empathy, my fellow real Americans, but empathy with a point of view, other than rich white man (or Other masquerading as such).

Surely the GOP could have done a better job of getting the message out there about Sotomayor’s racism? I mean, we all know that only rich white men can be objective and rational. We also know that this is a Christian nation, and as such, God only wants real Christians (aka, the Chosen White Men) to lead us. God is not, as it turns out, color-blind.

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And did you know that she’s a woman? Adam’s Helpmate was not meant to interpret law, but rather to support her man while he interprets the laws. Especially when said laws concern her own body. Only a rich white man really knows what a woman should do with her body.

These are dark times of fear, great nation. May I suggest you find the biggest flag you can, wrap yourself in it protectively, and huddle with your bible as we veer deep into the dank cave of Democracy?

It seems that whether we like it or not, we may soon have a Supreme Court Justice who represents a large group of citizens.

Perish the thought.

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