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From The Inside: Scammed by the Family Values Money Machine
With Promises of Protection, Security and Ultimate Victory, Peddlers of “Family Values” Manufactured a Culture War, and Capitalized on Our Fears
by Vyckie Garrison @ No Longer Quivering
I’ve had a sick feeling in my stomach lately. It’s the feeling that comes along with a growing realization that the Quiverfull worldview and lifestyle which I felt that I had carefully considered and thoughtfully adopted is, in actuality, a product called “Biblical Family Values” which is being aggressively marketed as an investment to safeguard our loved ones from becoming collateral damage in today’s “War Against the Family.”
That’s right ~ “Traditional Family Values” is a product and we bought it big-time.
I should have figured this out much sooner.
Seems that I should have been immune to the marketing strategies of those who ruthlessly engender fear and dissatisfaction so they can offer their products as the remedy for the very malady which they themselves created. After all, one of the first “family values” books I read is All The Way Home: Power for Your Family to be Its Best - in which author, Mary Pride explains that happy, well-adjusted families are not very profitable. In order to sell self-help books, couple’s retreats, therapy sessions, etc. -husbands and wives (mainly wives) need to be convinced that something’s wrong – something’s missing – they need help!
Exactly. That’s why we didn’t watch television, read popular magazines or otherwise expose ourselves to the endless barrage of advertisements calculated to instill feelings of discontent in our hearts – sure saved ourselves a lot of money that way.
And I was vaguely aware of the same principle in operation during my years as publisher and editor of a “pro-life, pro-family” Christian family newspaper. I kept current on all the latest skirmishes in America’s on-going “Culture War.”
“I’m sure these organizations have the best of intentions when they push legislation to remove the marriage penalty from the tax code, force cable companies to offer ‘a la carte’ subscriptions on premium channels, introduce competition into the education system by promoting school choice and vouchers, demand that merchants who profit from the commercialization of Christ’s birth acknowledge ‘Christmas’ in their promotional advertisements, etc.,” I wrote in a March 2006 editorial.
“But I can’t help but notice how out of touch some of these ‘pro-family’ organizations appear to be with real-life families in America. A lot of money and manpower has been spent in the ‘battle for America’s families’ – yet little has changed and in fact, in the years since the launch of the ‘Moral Majority’ our families have gone from confusion to chaos to crisis.”
Back then, it was dawning on me that the whole idea of a “culture war” has been artificially manufactured to create fear and insecurity so that we will take out our checkbooks and purchase “protection” for our families. Kind of similar to war in general -it’s a big money-making business and a lot of people have a vested interest in keeping it going.
As Chris Hedges, author of American Fascists: The Christian Right and the War on America, points out, “All radical movements need a crisis or a prolonged period of instability to achieve power,” – and, I would add – make lots of money.
It was somewhat bewildering for me to realize that so much of our lives and our choices are really all about some other guy making obscene amounts of cash – and most of us only have a vague idea that we are being used in this way.
I well remember recognizing this principle in operation during my years as a staunch, “pro-life” advocate. (Please note: I’m relating this info. from my former “pro-life” perspective to give you a glimpse inside the mindset of the Religious Right. Truthfully, as a fundamentalist Believer, a woman’s choice was not even on my radar.)
Check it out ~ I just happen to have a PBA graphic on hand in “My Pictures” – a left-over from my Religious Right newspaper publishing days ~ ugh.
The first time I saw Operation Rescue’s pictures of aborted babies – all bloody and dismembered with recognizable tiny little baby fingers amongst the horror – I had a strong physical reaction which cemented my determination to “fight for the unborn.” BUT … after a while, I could look at those same pictures and not be much affected. So then, the pro-lifers come out with the Partial-Birth Abortion graphics – showing a fully-developed baby – delivered except for its head – with a pair of scissors stabbed into the base of its skull – a vacuum hose is inserted into the resulting hole and the baby’s brains are sucked out – the baby goes limp – OMG!! I totally freaked! I was SHOCKED out of my apathy and renewed my efforts on the behalf of the unborn. AND I SENT MONEY – plenty of it – to those pro-life organizations which were on the “front lines” of the battle to rescue the babies. BUT … it wasn’t long before the idea of partial-birth abortion didn’t stir me quite so violently … And a while later, I began to hear about the pain which unborn babies feel during an abortion – and there was a campaign to force abortion clinics to inform their clients of the pain their about-to-be-killed babies would suffer – and to offer the mother pain-medication for the baby prior to the procedure … As I read the pro-life medical professionals’ expert testimony regarding the evidence that aborted babies feel pain … Well, to tell the truth, by this point, I was beginning to catch on to the escalation-of-horror tactics used by these “Right-To-life” organizations and it just made me mad to realize the manipulation.
I remember discussing this with my (ex)husband – I told him that we were unlikely to get rich in our newspaper business simply because I was unwilling to print the most sensational news items which might scare our readers into sending more money. I would do everything I could do in good conscience to promote the pro-life cause – but I would not resort to terrorism – and that is exactly how I had come to view the more extreme fund raising tactics of these organizations.
Where there is an actual need – I’m all for enterprising people making and selling their products and solutions. Just don’t invent a need – and certainly DO NOT perpetuate a WAR – the Culture War – just to make a buck.
Oddly enough, while I understood this in regard to the “Christian Right” in general, I completely overlooked the profit-driven nature of the phenomenal growth I witnessed in the Biblical Family Values movement. I would often remark that “this family vision is spreading like wildfire” – all the while, oblivious to the fact that, of course it’s growing – there’s big money to be had in selling family stability and security to desperate moms and dads who’ve come to Christianity as refugees from dysfunctional homes; parents who are confused and scared for the future and they’re looking for answers as they scramble to raise their children in a healthier environment than that which they had experienced as kids.
According to this Salon article by Lynn Harris, Michael and Debi Pearl – whose “child-training” advice incited Quiverfull parents, Kevin and Elizabeth Statz to beat their 9-year-old daughter, Lydia, to death using quarter-inch plumbing supply line - are “part of the booming religious publishing and products market, which hit $7.3 billion in 2005 — a 28 percent increase since 2002. … Among Christian books, the ‘Christian Living’ subcategory, which includes parenting, is one of the most popular sub-segments; products for children are expanding as well. The Packaged Facts report, titled ‘The Religious Product Market in the U.S.,’ cites ‘the culture wars’ as being one reason for this overall growth.”
Quiverfull is clearly a specialization of the “family values” niche market that has proven so lucrative for the Christian publishing industry in general. Truthfully, it’s turning my stomach as I’m contemplating the fact that my family – and tens of thousands of Quiverfull families like ours – have been scammed and exploited for profit.
Scammed and exploited. For profit.
I’m sure the Pearls, Vision Forum and other merchants of Quiverfull are sincere in their belief that there really is a Big Bad Enemy “out there” who wants to devour the children of Believers – but I’m also discovering that there are plenty of “family values” peddlers with not-so-pure motives. “Dogemperor” has done a ton of insightful research on this subject: (read here - and that’s just for starters).
So yeah – it is all about MONEY. And that wouldn’t be so much of a problem except that the practice of Biblical Family Values is actually a sort of circular predicament in which the proffered “cure” actually feeds and accelerates the disease.
By the time it was all over for us, I had amassed an unbelievably enormous library from the Pearls, Vision Forum, American Vision, Wallbuilders, Answers in Genesis, Grace & Truth Books, Inheritance Publications, and similar peddlers of the Biblical Family vision – bookshelf after bookshelf stuffed to overflowing with “how to have a happy family”-type books, audio tapes, CDs and DVDs. I used to make jokes about the fact that the biggest category in our budget after food was BOOKS. But I’m not laughing about it now.
“I’ve been thinking recently about a scene from the animated Disney classic, Bambi in which the forest animals are hiding ever-so-quietly as a group of hunters pass by. No-one moves a muscle and they’re hardly breathing and tension builds as the background music escalates and the danger draws closer until one terrified duck can’t stand it another moment. “I can’t take it! I can’t take it!” she screams and frantically flies from her hiding place seeking an escape and a place of safety only to be shot dead in the next instant.“The reason this poor, dead bird comes to mind just now is that the intensity and anticipation of that scene seems a vivid picture of life at our house lately. It’s been tense and overwhelming because of the current trials we face and the perceived nearness of the enemy.”
And here’s the part that really makes me sick: “The Enemy” – the “World,” which for so many years I had feared and shunned, has turned out to be a paper tiger – and in most cases, not just harmless, but even benevolent and beneficial – same thing goes for just about everything which my fundamentalist/Quiverfull beliefs led me to guard my family against: television (Spongebob!), secular music, public school, peer pressure, boy/girl dating relationships, fashionable clothing, feminist values, convenience foods, teen rebellion, social workers and professional counselors, youth groups … and even the really big spooks: homosexuals and atheists.
A friend recently put it this way: It’s like buying insurance to protect you from the boogeyman under the bed.
Exactly.
So I spent over a quarter century fighting with all my might in this war that was mostly all in my head. We were on the front lines with our family newspaper – and in homeschooling we were preparing our children to enter the battle too. The war may have been imaginary, but the wounds inflicted are all too real. Seeing the severity of my children’s suffering was the impetus which moved me to lay down my weapons of warfare and walk away from the fight.
It’s not my war anymore. The patriarchal “Big Guy” of the bible is no longer my God – I’m done offering up my children as ammunition for His crusades.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Vyckie Garrison started No Longer Qivering to tell the story of her “escape” from the Quiverfull movement. Over time, NLQ has developed into a valuable resource of information regarding the deceptions and dangers of the Quiverfull philosophy and lifestyle. Several more former QF adherents are now contributing their stories to NLQ and our collective voice makes these Quiverfull warnings impossible to dismiss or ignore.
NLQ is a gathering place for women escaping and recovering from spiritual abuse.
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Cathy
Sep. 1st, 2011 at 12:58 pm
Fear used as a weapon is destructive to all humans, especially when used on an uninformed and “protected from the enemy” population. To perpetuate the fear is bad enough, but to use it for profit is truly evil.
Carrie
Sep. 1st, 2011 at 3:56 pm
This really touched me. Thanks for writing it. Im so glad I found politicus.
Pat Padrnos
Sep. 1st, 2011 at 4:26 pm
Wow. Very impressive article. All of us are so busy with our lives and yet we know these things are happening all around us. Certainly not to the depth the author went into. As I was reading it I thought of other “organizations and entities” that control their people – with fear and ignorance. All you have to do is look at the political parties – in particular the Repubs and TParty folks. How about Warren Jeffs and that repulsive situation he and others created? There are people in his following who will never lead what you and I might call a “normal” life.
Happy every single day I am an aging hippy!!
SinghX
Sep. 1st, 2011 at 4:42 pm
Thank you, Vyckie for coming out and sharing your experiences. I also thank Politicsusa for hearing the need to have former cultist tell their stories in the main media. It’s one of the best strategies to push back against the NAR, Christian Reconstruction, et al.
In 2009, I read a comment by Kathleen Joyce, author of the Quiverfull Movement book stating, “Although the Quiverfull movement does a lot of things that seem cultish, it is not a cult”. Oh please…
I beg to differ. The author obviously spoke without knowledge; didn’t bother to look up the definition of cult, read Dr. Margaret Singer’s chart that lays out the degrees of groups considered benign to those who use thought reform programs, nor, did she bothered to read the basic primer by Lifton defining the 8 criteria on thought reform. Those two sources alone give the basic knowledge of how to define, describe, determine “what/who is a cult?”
The Quiverfull groups follows the criteria list to the letter; all 8 criteria are met. Former members describe the coercive persuasive techniques used to reel them recruits to the movement/group, authoritarianism, milieu control, scared science (ultimate truth doctrine), loading the language, dispensing of existence (girls who’s “existence” is based upon submission)…how can this author say it’s not a cult? Maybe it’s because she’s looking at that “glowing review”, which she got from “Christianity Today” magazine.
It’s a cult–it screams out in overt isolation,subjugation of women, submission to doctrine over person, gives special names and special twist to their “right” authoritarianism, hair/clothing restrictions, no formal education (especially for women) so members cannot make informed, critical decisions as all must submission without question…former members who can’t have a life “outside” because they have no foundation or skills but those of a community who teaches them to shun the “sinner” when sins are exposed, and on and on.
This cult has been around since 1985 and recruits all over the confederate south. Yes, we all know the christian fundamentalist base doesn’t really understand that they are psychological pawns programed to react to anything as “un-christian” by anyone who thinks different. All they know is, fear when told to fear! The Quiverfull movement provides a vehicle for spreading fear throughout a family “base” as agents of god, or some version of Joel’s Army.
This organization, the Botkin’s, needs their non-profit-churchy status removed and a wide spread investigations of spousal, child abuse and neglect.
Vyckie Garrison
Sep. 1st, 2011 at 5:00 pm
I’m guessing the reason Kathryn Joyce said Quiverfull is not a cult, per se, is because the movement is comprised of families who are very loosely connected and can hardly be called an “organization.” There is no official organization, no non-profit group – no recognized leader.
That said, in Quiverfull, each family becomes its own mini-cult with the patriarchal father ruling his family (and often a home church group) using common cult mind-control techniques.
SinghX
Sep. 2nd, 2011 at 11:33 am
Here is the link to the 501C organization of Vision Quest ministries, the originator Douglas, the charismatic leader behind the movement. Even though the perception is a “loose” organization, it’s under-pinning reveal other wise.
www.visionforumministries...
/about_the_president.aspx
I would say that Douglas is the charismatic leader of the Quiverfull movement. The group IS organized into a series of small cult cells spread all over the place; it’s the same MO used by the KKK (hence the popularity in the south). By keeping the cell groups small, spread out and, only communicating through controlled channels via the leader’s literature/approved literature, goals of the leader as head of the “organization” are met. This is a very rigid, highly controlled, closed ended feed-back loop…yet, it appears “loose”.
Even though the Quiverfull families do not live in “compound” together, like Warren’s Jeffs tribe, it doesn’t disqualify them as a cult; that is a common misconception, that people must live communally to be a cult; most live spread out to appear “larger”, one in every city mind set.
Douglas makes “the rules” for everyone to abide; then, manipulations are carried out by the “father” and more and more coercive techniques are applied…hence, Douglas has lots of power as the supreme “decider”, then, exploits followers for lots of $$$ as a way to keep “connected”.
The goal of a cult is “mind control”; a cult, by definition is “a group of people who organize around a strong authority figure who attempts to expand their influence for the purpose or money and power.” It is perception of the “connection” that allows people to be fooled into thinking the are “running” their own show instead of their co-dependency on a decision-maker.
If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck…
Vyckie Garrison
Sep. 2nd, 2011 at 12:21 pm
Very interesting information, SinghX ~ thank you.
Ugh – it’s worse than I thought – and I already was convinced that it’s pretty bad …
SinghX
Sep. 2nd, 2011 at 3:44 pm
Sorry…Reality is pretty harsh “friend” sometimes…I know how you feel.
It takes a lot of guts to go public knowing you’re still looking over your shoulder as a “rebellious woman traitor”. Cults don’t play nice when you upset their money flow in an expose’ fashion…keep up the good work and don’t be afraid!
Shiva (Moderator)
Sep. 1st, 2011 at 4:53 pm
there is so much of this in our life. Women who are told they are not beautiful unless they use certain products, weigh a certain amount I look a certain way.
Whether you know it or not grocery stores do the same thing to you by the sequence and manner in which they stock their food.
This only makes sense for the Christian right to be in it for the money. What is money bring? It brings power. Money and power are the final achievements of what these people want in my opinion.
Michelle
Sep. 1st, 2011 at 5:58 pm
Well said Vickie!
Mykelb
Sep. 1st, 2011 at 6:58 pm
I have never understood people’s need for religion. In America today, it is nothing more than a bunch of hucksters selling mythology to the mindless, ignorant, authoritarian, enlarged amygdalans. I and many of my friends and family have gotten along fine without it (all my siblings have master’s degrees) and we all make 100K plus salaries. My parents were agnostics and raised us to believe in ourselves, our connection to one another and to nature, not some mythological entity.
SinghX
Sep. 2nd, 2011 at 4:04 pm
Human beings are multi-dimensional creatures with brains that need a lot of “stuff”. It’s impossible for us to completely void out “a” spiritual need as we seem to always want to know that when we die, the universe is somehow going to do something to preserve us, deal with us, have some meaning, a just ending…”stuff” like that.
As Karen Armstrong puts it (I’m paraphrasing), we need to achieve a spiritual as well as earthly well-being; we have an unconscious “energy” with in that acts as a reminder that we could not exist without some kind of a “divine guide” to help us through our lives.
Humans need both reasoning/logic/facts as well as myth/spirit to explain our complex and sometimes perplexing lives; it keeps us in balance, gives us rhythm, equilibrium. Not every one is capable of creating a balance of those two worlds, or so it seems…that’s why (IMHO) their are those who actually “lust”, create a state of obsessive “maya” in order to reach some kind of certainty that they are one with their sky-god…hucksters is what you called them, I believe.
Fundamentalist religious groups have combined the “mythos with the logos” in a deadly combination. History prevails on the side of facts that whenever these two concepts are combined to create a lust-greed-power triad, we are in big ass trouble…you can have myth and you can have logic/reason, but combining them to create an absolute truth ideology…deadly.
harleyblueswoman
Sep. 1st, 2011 at 9:45 pm
the up side is that someday all these people will pay dearly for their so called “Christian” works!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Vengeance is mine saith the Lord!!
Kim
Sep. 1st, 2011 at 9:57 pm
I thank you, Vyckie, for having the guts to recognize what the “movement” is and how it can destroy that which you sought to achieve by fear and greed. Religion of any kind is always based on fear and greed. That is how organized religion began and how it profits. It’s how the “haves” control the “have nots” from the beginning of time. Good luck to you in your new-found knowledge and life as you will be vilified for your departure.
SinghX
Sep. 2nd, 2011 at 7:30 pm
One more piece of evidence…this is chilling to say the least.
botkinsyndrome.blogspot.c...
AFM
Sep. 4th, 2011 at 5:12 pm
The sad thing is these families really raise their children in a sheltered life style. When they go out in the real world they usually are unable to relate to others unless they put their guard down. My daughter-in-law sister use to get in fights at school because she had a big mouth and she sort of attracted trouble. Anyway her freshman year her mother decided to home school her. She did very well. In fact she done so well she won’t even leave the house to attend any college. She stays home watching her baby she managed to have at the age of 17. She is sheltered to afraid to really go out and get a job. Now I kind of lived a sheltered life. Our parents motto was if you couldn’t bring your kids to an event they didn’t go. We were alway first before themself. I came from a large family long before quiverfull was in style. My mom was a stay at home mom and dad was the bread winner. The point is I found out how much I really didn’t know because my parents protected us and I was a push over. Once out in the real world you learn. When I got married my husband stopped people from taking advantage of me. Alot of that was being protected and wanting to please people. I didn’t think I was good enough. But with my great husband I learned to finally speak up for myself and now if I see something wrong I don’t hold it in. I feel sorry for kids who grow up in these protected families. In the long run they really are hurting them and not protecting them. There must be a balance. Kids need to see the good and the bad.
Mrs. Sixx
Sep. 5th, 2011 at 4:23 pm
As a former Jehovah’s Witness, I can assure you that Quiverfull is but one of the ‘cults’ out there who control their members through fear — of the ‘world’, of the devil — and especially of anyone who has left the faith. JW’s are indoctrinated to believe that only they will live once the battle between God and the Devil takes place. Anyone not a witness is going to die — and therefore is suspect. There should be no association with people outside of the faith — and this INCLUDES family members who have left. Former members who no longer believe are considered evil apostates who have ‘mental illness’ — and they are to be avoided at all costs (in other words, they practice shunning. The ‘governing body’ in New York directs what members can and cannot do (and they are believed to get their direction directly from God) — members are told to shut down FB pages, they are warned against reading ANYTHING religious that is not directly from the governing body. They are warned not to read anything by apostates, as it is evil and it could shake their faith — and the Internet is considered the den of all evil. Post-high school education is frowned upon, as college might encourage worldly philosophies. Women are to be in submission to their husbands in all things. Women are not allowed to teach in the church (Kingdom Hall). They advise elders that if children are molested by members, they only have to contact the authorities if it is required by law. Otherwise, they keep it quiet so that they do not bring bad publicity to the organization.
I wish more bloggers would investigate Jehovah’s Witnesses. I was involved in the religion for over 30 years, and it wasn’t until I got away from it that I was able to see how they distorted the truth. This so-called religion is based upon lie upon lie. And the damage they have done to countless people is well-documented all over the internet, and in books. They are just as dangerous as the Quiverfull movement.
Reithe
Sep. 11th, 2011 at 10:22 pm
I am amazed that I escaped my first 20+ years of life without more wounds than I have now. To this day, I feel as though the people I meet outside my home are untrustworthy, even when I care about them deeply. Even though I know they do not intend me harm, it is very had to shake the belief that the secular world is not still the enemy, even though I am no longer a part of that previous, distrustful world in which I grew up.
I read this blog post and wanted to cry out with the truth of it. It frightens me to know just how afraid I was as a child of people who never have harmed me.