According To Fox News If You Love The Planet You Hate People

JOB CREATORS LOVE PEOPLE!
JOB CREATORS LOVE PEOPLE!

According to Fox News, if you love the planet you hate people.

And by people, they mean corporations because we all know that corporations should come before the existence of the planet. Doh.

From the January 14 edition of Fox News’ Cashin’ In with Megyn Kelley’s Saturday doppleganger Cheryl Cecile Casone, courtesy of Media Matters:

Yes, indeed, “Greens love animals but they hate people!”

It’s hard to know with these folks, but I believe they’re complaining about a fine resulting from a law passed in 2007 (naturally they fail to mention this, because that’s when George W. Bush was president hence the vague reference to the “greens” – that would be YOU, you planet loving corporation hating heathen scum). This rather poorly written law, the Energy Independence and Security Act of 2007, was designed to make the US energy independent by encouraging the use of alternative fuel types as well as reducing green house gases.

If the Right were behind the law (if it, for example, encouraged drilling here now), they would be selling it as freedum USA! But because it failed to address eventuality of alternative fuel not being available in attempting to encourage alternative fuel usage, it’s ripe for ridicule. We note that Fox’s push for deregulating of the oil industry was not ridicule worthy when Deepwater Horizon exploded. That was just “one bad apple.”

Somehow this law, which they conveniently associate via the lower third with “new EPA powers,” is also hurting the job creators. The lower third reads (as they discuss 2007 law): “WORRIES MOUNT NEW EPA POWERS WILL HURT JOB CREATORS.” Those Fox producers are good at the smear by association gambit.

How many Fox News viewers will think this law was passed by the Obama Marxists or is the result of a current change? Uh huh. And those poor job creators! Poor oil companies! My heart bleeds. Also, screw the planet, you tree-huggers!

Just a few months ago when Fox were once again afraid of the EPA boogeyman, they made wild claims (inaccurately, of course) that the EPA was expanding by hundreds of thousands of people (adding 230,000 employees to the current 11,000 and a crazy budget to boot). It’s like they live in an alternate reality over there, where the facts don’t matter and they never feel compelled to correct themselves.

Which leads me to my next point. Since homo sapiens translates as “wise man,” we can conclude that Fox News is not run by human beings (in the plural, homines sapientes), a.k.a. “people.” After all, higher-level thought processes such as self-awareness and rationality are considered to be defining features of what constitutes a “person.”

So Fox may be an animal, but that would infer that we, the “greens” (aka: people who like living) love them. Clearly this is not factual. If not an animal, and still a living thing (something we have not yet established), Fox News is a plant, fungus or single-celled organism. Fox News: Living thing or not? You may vote in the comment section but please give your reasons for your choice. Example: Fox News is a single-cell organism as proven every time one of their hosts opens their mouths. Or Fox News is not a living thing as proven by the mechanical hearts under the Fox puppets (please cite sources). Etc.

If only I could be at the controls for just one Fox segment… In this one, I would have replaced the background with an image of the Deepwater Horizon explosion and labeled it “Job Creators Love People.”

Prepare yourself for the next conservative talking point: the EPA (even the under-funded, courtesy of Bush) is evil, Greenies hate people and Job Creators are under constant assault by evil classists who think real people (animals) deserve to live.

The Fox show Cashin’ In is part of Fox’s “Cost of Freedom” line up. Speechless.

24 Replies to “According To Fox News If You Love The Planet You Hate People”

  1. Fox – living – A Wookalar – A half pig/ half human creature that will

    “suck your brains right out your nose!”

    (from the movie “The Private Eyes”)

  2. Fox News is neither Vulpes fulva nor Urocyon cinereus. It isn’t a foxglove, either. Some mushrooms are that stupidly poisonous, but they’re much prettier and less noisy. Single-celled organisms don’t get nearly that big, and none have faces like Rupert Murdoch. Fox News has openly declared it doesn’t need to live on this planet. I therefore declare it to be an ET, and one hostile to terrestrial life.

  3. Fox news is a parasitic organism. Like any parasite it invades it’s host (the viewer) and takes over, once inside the host is transformed into a talking point spewing zombie. The infection quickly spreads, especially among conservative leaning and the religious. The only way to protect yourself from this parasite is to have an IQ above room temperature.

  4. How can Faux claim the EPA is killing jobs when they’re also claiming 230,000 new EPA positions are being created?

    LOL They don’t even pay attention to their own irony-laced bullshit…

  5. The Dems need to grow a pear(yes a pear beucase a pair is far too much to ask for)and literally destroy Fox and the GOP after the elections with every lie they have told.

  6. I have a bunch of fruit tree catalogues. We can maybe chip in and get the DNC a nice Bartlett or Moonglow or Magness, so that they can not only grow a few pears, but get some wood.

  7. I do not hate corporations, which as Mittens tells me, are people. I do not hate people either. Hate requires more energy than love does. I choose not to feed Fox, as a living organism. I will not pay for cable or satellite, since Fox is paid whether I watch their programming, as part of a subscription. I also do not purchase or use the products that are advertised on Fox.

    I have found lists of products made by Koch Industries and it’s subsidies, and the same lists are available for NewsCorp. Since Fox is alive in the corporate sense, I will not feed it’s need to maximize it’s profit margins.

    I am only one person, but I do believe that the small amount of money I deny them will eventually starve the beast.

  8. Oh goddess!
    I had to laugh at the headline…and then I realized..it is not a
    joke? Yea, we hate people. That’s why libs are always trying to help people.
    I can’t understand how the clown show that is fox stays on the air? And idiots watch it????
    So all of us that hate people… Lets get in our Suvs and gin up for a war with Iran for oil doncha know…oh wait…
    That’s fox news job.
    We are trying to SAVE the planet, and all the creatures great or small. How dare us?
    @ newmeximan right on, me too starve the beast. I just got a bicycle instead of a car! If everyone one went car-less one day a month or a one day a WEEK…we could bring them to their knees…

  9. Actually, I have identified the organism. It is, in fact, a kind of mushroom: the stinkhorn, whose scientific name is Phallus impudens. No, wait a minute. That’s actually Rupert Murdoch, or maybe Roger Ailes…

  10. I wonder when the GOP became the party of hate. They have marginalized the majority of Americans. They hate blacks, Hispanics, Asians, Iran, clean air and water, safe food, anything with the word ‘green’ attached (sorry, Kermit!), conservation of energy, weather reports, women, the poor, the elderly, the sick, low-income workers, unions….just who do they think is going to vote for anyone GOP this year? I mean, really.

  11. Bravo! Perfect! I (rather me and my fleas) salute you, follow the same principles and hope that others will read this and join in your “practical” quest to “starve the beast”!

    (BTW, my name is known as the “scum of the earth” in “certain” parts of New Mexico…I was “exiled” many moons ago)

  12. Crumbs…the Fox are/is (?) “crumbs”….the don’t start out as any particular product, like food or feces, industrial waste, but, exist as a by-product matter smaller than 1/64th of an inch to 1/8…bigger than that, it should be eaten or washed down the river (opps, my bad, as it could indeed pollute the river…)

    If they are, perhaps, alive then, Fox is biological warfare and should therefore be disbanded, burned, buried, isolated, whatever else it takes as a precaution to make sure they can no longer harm any living thing…

  13. So when does this become the plot of yet another bad Saturday Night movie on Syfy? Can’t wait to see it!

  14. Sadly, Cali, many of us living in rural area live too far away from everything not to be dependent on our cars, but if we were have solar cars…. well, then, using the sun to run our transports would less money spent on fossil fuels. 65,000,000 years ago, an asteroid killed that which our fossil fuels are made from. when will another much smaller asteroid land on Faux News studios and put them out of our misery?

  15. So obviously Fox news isn’t run by people who believe that we were given stewardship of this planet from a God who expected us to cherish it.

  16. Since FOX NOISE is part of an alternative universe, where up is down and black is white, they will naturally deny reality especially when it doesn’t conform to the regressive, nihilistic worldview they like to promote.

  17. Why didn’t anyone tell them that people are actually animals? Or maybe Faux News think people are vegetables? That would make sense actually.

  18. I ditto SinghX
    “Bravo! Perfect! I (rather me and my fleas) salute you, follow the same principles and hope that others will read this and join in your “practical” quest to “starve the beast”!
    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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