Warning! Watching Twilight Invites Demonic Possession And ALEC

Mormonism in Republican Eyes
Mormonism in Republican Eyes

Poor Stephanie Meyer is being attacked again by Right wing “Christians”. This time it’s Pat Robertson, that beacon of God’s word (unrecognizable to those who were brought up reading the other Bible).

Pat Robertson warned viewers on the February 9 edition of CBN’s The 700 Club that watching Twilight invites the Demonic in. Watch here courtesy of Media Matters:

Thanks a lot, Pat, for the timely warning. HELLO, it’s too late now.

Twilight series author Stephanie Meyer is a Mormon. She has said that her faith inspires her work in a positive way, “I don’t think my books are going to be really graphic or dark, because of who I am. There’s always going to be a lot of light in my stories.”

Perhaps Pat’s superficiality impedes him from seeing beyond the surface of vampires whom the author uses as a vehicle of expression for the kind of teenage angst that believes in forever love. Or maybe Stephanie Meyer has an evil agenda, but as an example of American exceptionalism, and a franchise of corporate envy, Meyer is “entitled” to her “free speech” and shouldn’t be told what she can and cannot write by big government religion. Maybe her religion is Demonism. Hey, we let the fake Christians in, why not the Demons? (Pardon the redundancy.)

But maybe Pat is subtly undercutting Mitt Romney, who has admitted that he enjoyed reading the Twilight series and is also a Mormon. I feel an investigation coming on. Perhaps Republicans should take a break from their we can’t eat feti bill to launch a full scale investigation into Congress regarding who is and who is not a Demon.

They can move on from there to the presidential candidates, but heck, we don’t even need to have those investigations, because we all know who the Demons are. The Republicans have been telling us for years now who is and who is not a Demon, and gosh darn it if the Bible didn’t teach me to always believe the person shouting the loudest and pointing their one finger out, casting the first stone.

To be fair, I’m not sure if Pat Robertson is suggesting that Mitt Romney is Demonic or perhaps has simply been taken over by Demons.

Inquiring minds want to know: HOW WILL WE KNOW, PAT? What are the signs of a Demonic takeover? Will they froth at the mouth, their heads spin, what? Online “Christian” forums warn us of Stephanie Meyer’s evil Mormon intentions, such as: “Many red-flags appear when the author, Stephanie Meyer, is considered. First of all, she is a Mormon and is quoted saying that she is ‘against humanity.'” Indeed! Jesus did love rumor mongering, bearing false witness via misquotes and taking Becksian leaps of logic to the dark side. But the question of the day is, does it count if you just pass laws to kill humanity by say, starving them or depriving them of healthcare? Or is it just words and not deeds that tell us who’s been possessed?

Or will we know them from their fruits? Will they lie in order to create division and hate? Will there be secret meetings and lots of money pouring in to advance a Demonic agenda behind closed doors? Will there be wolves in sheeps’ clothing pretending to be Representatives of the people?

Oh my!

Might there be an evil corporate sponsored group that flies in these “representatives” from around the country on private jets to meet in secret in order to advance an agenda that profits the Devil…..

Oh no!

Would it be an indication of Demonic influence if say, underhanded “pay-to-play” politics were being foisted upon the people under the covert cover of a “scholarship fund”? If this entity tried to take away long-standing civil rights, enacted voting ID laws and killed unions, would we call that Demonic influence?

Oh, yes!

If there were such a Demonic influence, do we imagine that it would use a hidden distribution network of evil blood money in order to gain control of the government, sucking the life out of the government created for the people until it was nothing but a slave for the blood thirsty Devil?

Certainly, such a Demon would not announce itself. Oh, no.

Would Pat say that any lawmaker who allowed such a Demon to wine and dine them on “junkets” and then enacted the legislation the Demon drew up in order to advance the Demonic agenda of Satan had “invited” the Demon in?

I’m thinking that maybe, just maybe, Pat is on to something.

I’m thinking that the American Legislative Exchange Council is the Demon and the Republican Party is the teenager inviting them in.

Pat might be familiar with ALEC. They call themselves “bipartisan”. They are a furtive organization of corporate lobbyists who hold cloak and dagger meetings with over 2000 elected state representatives, almost all of whom are stealthy Republicans, and these “representatives” come home after their clandestine “meetings” with dark legislation that benefits the corporations. They then introduce these Demonic bills to appease the Demon they invited in, after being weakened by their lust for money and power (in the name of “Jesus”, of course).

Meanwhile, poor Mitt Romney and all Twilight fans are now smeared as Demons in yet another episode of Republican use of projection to distract the masses.

Additional Source: In These Times, print version February 2012 ALEC’s Arizona Escort Service (January online article)
Image: HubPages

9 Replies to “Warning! Watching Twilight Invites Demonic Possession And ALEC”

  1. Actually, the resemblance between Dissocialism and Vampirism was one I noticed over forty years ago. Dissocialists can’t live on normal, mortal sustenance. They don’t feel they’re living unless they’re sucking the life out of an endless string of victims. In the world they are trying to create, you either live as a vampire or die as food, and nothing infuriates them so much as a human being who does neither. That is why they are Hell-bent on creating a society where no one can escape their rotton Hobson’s choice.

  2. the real fun part is the woman sitting there with a straight face. Pat Robertson says there are no vampires it’s all demonic stuff. But I got news for you Pat. If you believe in God you might as well believe in demons and quite frankly after that the next step down is vampires. They are all around us.

    The second funniness is Pat telling about a demon being cast out of someone in the demon saying he had permission because he went to a movie. I don’t believe these people could get any funnier. I have to think, and I certainly could be wrong here because quite frankly I’m not up on my demonic stuff, that a demon would not be limited to exhibiting himself by using someone’s body. If there were demons we would have Ghostbusters all over the place, and quite frankly if were was a God there wouldn’t be demons.

    I am over the demon stuff, I am over the Pat Robertson stuff, and I am over the Pat Robertson constantly having pretty young women on this show. The man is a pervert and demonically disposed

  3. you kiddies here are too young to know this, but when i was a youngin, in 77 when the 1st star wars came out, uncle crusty pat was proclaiming the same exact thing. he warned the good xtians that it would make your kids into Buddhists!…. same schtick from Rumpelstiltskin… we would watch on UHF channels back then were the cheapo stations that pat could buy time on, and laugh our arses off. its still funny, if it wasnt so sad.

  4. Lemee get this straight. Vampires are myth and folklore, but creatures with hooves and horns living in other dimensions, with the tendency to jump into peoples bodies ( while speaking jibberish and rolling their eyes in the back of their heads )are real? Ooookaaay.

  5. Demons? Pat, buddy, remember that “thou anointest my head with oil” part? You’re in the snake oil line, Mr. Robertson. That automatically sends you back to the green pasture to lie down.(sic) Don’t make him maketh you. Peace, Tinky Winky

  6. Televangelist Pat Robertson declared Tuesday that God wants the entire world to hold an enormous closeout mattress sale this coming weekend or face immediate destruction. Robertson made this announcement on his 700 Club TV show.

    “I heard it loud and clear. God was yelling ‘Sunday, Sunday, Sunday’ and ‘everything must go.’ He mentioned a ‘mattress sale armageddon’ and said the prices must be low enough as to threaten everyone with insanity,” Robertson said. “I knew this was coming, first America accepted homosexuality and now God is threatening to destroy us unless we go out and buy new mattresses.”

    Robertson said he has such a close relationship with God that the almighty wakes him up every weekday at 6:00 a.m., often with a joke or two and the day’s news, traffic and the weather. If Robertson falls back to sleep, God repeatedly tries to rouse him every five minutes until he succeeds.

    “It’s usually just the Lord himself speaking to me, but this time Jesus was talking as well. For all their threats they really seemed in good spirits as they were both calling some of their other followers and pranking them,” Robertson said. “Jesus called this one fellow, pretended to be the guy’s boss and said he was fired. They really do work in mysterious ways.”


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