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Religious Right Leader Rick Wiles is Fascinated by Obama’s Privates

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Back in 2009, based on something he’d heard on Fox News, Rush Limbaugh went off on one of his (perhaps Oxycontin-induced) flights of fantasy and claimed that President Obama wanted to “mandate circumcision” to prevent the spread of HIV. Politifact.com gave that one a well-deserved “Pants on Fire” rating.

Now Pastor Rick Wiles of Trunews, who was one of those offended by President Obama mocking Michele Bachmann at the White House Correspondents Dinner, has referred to Obama as the “uncircumcised Philistine in the White House.”

Yes. It’s time for foreskingate.

Last week, Mr. Obama’s adoring, obedient, subservient, lapdog news reporters gathered at the White House for the annual Correspondents Dinner. This is the event where Mr. Obama and news reporters gather to applaud each other. During Mr. Obama’s speech, he belittled former congresswoman Michele Bachmann, who recently warned that Mr. Obama’s foolish appeasement of Iran could lead to World War Three. Listen to Mr. Obama mock Michele Bachmann’s dire warning and mock biblical last days prophecies.

I realize most American pastors and evangelists are afraid to denounce the uncircumcised Philistine in the White House, but I’m not afraid of him. I’ll read to Mr. Obama some scriptures from the Holy Bible that he so often mocks. Sennacherib was an evil king just as Barack Obama is an evil president. Sennacherib led the people into sin against God, just as Obama is leading people into sin against God.

I’ll skip right over the part where Wiles and all the others who were offended fail to follow Jesus’ directive and turn the other cheek.

I’ll even ignore the part where Sennacherib was an Assyrian, not a Jewish king. His name means “Sîn has increased the brothers,” but Sin is the moon goddess, not Old Testament-style sin. To the extent Sennacherib may have sinned, I applaud him, because in the Bible, free choice is sin.

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HOWEVER, a couple of other questions immediately arise: One, why is Rick Wiles so interested in the president’s junk? And two, if he is uncircumcised, how would Wiles know?

I hope the pastor doesn’t pose a threat to national security by trying to sneak a peek into the White House bathrooms, right before he enters reparative therapy for his interest in another man’s private parts.

I really do think this is one of those instances in which the questioner is telling us far more about himself than he is hoping to expose about the president.

This is not the first time Republicans have shown their fascination for Obama’s presidential package, of course. Back in the same year Limbaugh charged Obama wanted to circumcise everybody, birthers implied Obama himself wasn’t circumcised.

That’s right. Maybe they failed to share notes with Limbaugh, but they somehow got the oh so clever idea that by demanding to see Obama’s junk, they would be able to determine whether or not he is actually an American.

And Christian – see the comments here – because, you know, they don’t get circumcised in Kenya (and apparently only Muslims get circumcised?). Don’t expect any of this to make sense.

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Which all just goes to show, if Germans love David Hasselhoff (and they do), white men (and some white women) are way too fascinated by black men’s genitalia and the, um…”apparatus” of white power, so to speak.

I don’t want to suggest some men are underpowered ::cough:: Rick Wiles ::cough::

I don’t even want say the birther crowd is represented by some of the dumbest people on earth, but these people are some of the dumbest people on earth. That includes Rush Limbaugh and Rick Wiles.

Obama has not and did not mock biblical prophecy. He mocked Michele Bachmann. And if Rick Wiles ought to be criticizing anyone it is Michele Bachmann for acting as a false prophet, against which the Bible warns. But then, of course, Wiles would also have to condemn himself as a false prophet.

All this may be moot of course, this whole Foreskingate thing, because if Wiles is right, a big space fireball is going to make us all crispy critters if the Supreme Court rules in favor of marriage equality.

My last question, and I am almost afraid to ask it is this: Are they going to be that interested in Ted Cruz’s package? After all, he wasn’t born in America either. Do we need to start asking of Ted Cruz, “Do you have the right stuff?”

And no, I really do not want that answered. I both suspect and hope we will not hear any of his opponents say during a debate, “Please proceed, Senator.”

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Save it for the ladies, or whoever, Mr. Cruz.

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