Scott Walker’s Wall Along the Canadian Border too Late to Keep out Ted Cruz

Hand him a shovel. He's already an expert at digging holes
Hand him a shovel. He’s already an expert at digging holes

Scott Walker, who made a fool of himself with comments made when the China stock market crashed, and then saw critics slam those comments as “childish,” has now announced that a U.S.-Canada wall is a “legitimate” idea.

Where was he when Cruz sneaked like Gollum across the Canadian-U.S. border? It’s a little late now.

It was during an interview on NBC’s “Meet the Press” that Walker revealed his trump Trump plan for a 5,525-mile wall along the Canadian border (3,987 miles excluding Alaska, which he didn’t specifically mention).

“Some people have asked us about that in New Hampshire. They raised some very legitimate concerns, including some law enforcement folks that brought that up to me at one of our town hall meetings about a week and a half ago. So that is a legitimate issue for us to look at.”

The following response to Walker’s plan comes from People For the American Way’s Regional Political Coordinator Scott Foval:

This sounds like a brilliant strategy, not for solving our nation’s immigration challenges, but for showing that there’s no idea too ridiculous for a candidate trying to build his anti-immigrant credentials. Our country doesn’t need more Trump-style demagoguery from GOP presidential candidates. We need comprehensive immigration reform that helps actual families.

I don’t know. Market Watch’s Quentin Fottrell offers five reasons to flee the United States for Canada. Or maybe Walker is anticipating that Americans will flee in droves if he is elected, and the wall is part of his plan to counter this.

So anyway, look, it’s not just Iowa that makes Republicans stupid. I mean, of course, more stupid than usual.

Walker, in particular, has been having so many issues with issues that even the mainstream media has noticed, which is never a good sign. CNN, for example, told its readers,

Walker first said he favored Trump’s idea of repealing birthright citizenship. He backed off that stance days later, telling a reporter that he hasn’t taken a position. And then last Sunday, he said that he isn’t advocating any changes to laws on the books — including the Fourteenth Amendment.

Despite taking three different positions in the course of a week, Walker insisted Sunday on NBC, his stance has been consistent.

Sounds like an attack of Romneyism. For which, we now know, there is no cure.

Meanwhile, Walker continues to say we need a secure border, which has the virtue of being simple, and therefore something he can remember well enough to repeat it endlessly each time a question is asked:

But notice these tweets, which he sent after Meet the Press, don’t mention Canada. Maybe he changed his mind again. Maybe he forgot. Maybe he figures it’s just a given at this point. We who live in Wisconsin know that Scott Walker is not an intelligent man. But hey, we have pretty bridges.

Under Republicans, we will apparently be a nation under siege, a Festung Amerika, with walls surrounding us north and south (Alaska, you got your mountain but you’re on your own, and Hawaii…well, you’re a long way from Canada and Mexico).

If Republican candidates are not starting to sound crazy, even to Republican voters, something is wrong. Sure, we see this game of one-upmanship every four years, with each candidate trying to outdo the other for the base, but you have to wonder how much crazier it can get than bankrupting ourselves with modern-day Maginot lines across our borders.

It’s not like Canada and Mexico plan to drive tanks across the border and despite Republican claims to the contrary, most of these people are not criminals, in fact, they are made victims of crime by the act of trying to reach the United States if they have not already been made victims at their point of origin.

Donald Trump has said Mexico will be made to pay for his wall – Mexico offered a big negative in response to that claim – but Walker has not said who will pay for his Canadian wall. You can be it won’t be the Canadians, and it won’t be the 1 percent.

One possible solution would be use the “Christie Plan” to employ FedEx to tag these folks when they come across the Rio Grande, whereupon they will be sent as slave labor to the Canadian border to dig trenches and build walls, like another totalitarian regime once did in occupied France.

Walker pointed the finger at Milwaukee and unions there as well, blaming them for what he’s done to Wisconsin: “Part of it is, I think, some of the poor policies in the city of Milwaukee.”

Maybe they’ll be the next ones to get the wall treatment.

It’s gotten out of hand. There is stupid and then there is Oh My God You Can’t Be Serious stupid. We’ve reached that point and crossed it with this collection of bumbling nincompoops who collectively don’t belong outside of the padded rooms of a mental hospital.

General George S. Patton said, “Fixed fortifications are a monument to the stupidity of man.” If so, we’ve got the perfect man for the job.

If Walker wants a wall with Canada, I say hand him a shovel and point him in the right direction, because if he’s anything like another Republican, Tom Cotton, he won’t know where to dig.

Meanwhile, we’re stuck with Ted Cruz. mean, it’s just too late. I’m sorry, but there it is. We’ll just have to deal with him on our own, and we can do that by voting. Please, please, please do vote, because if you let the Republicans win, you may not get another opportunity.

Unless, you know, you want to live in Festung Amerika.

Update: Response of People for the American Way (PFAW) added.

30 Replies to “Scott Walker’s Wall Along the Canadian Border too Late to Keep out Ted Cruz”

  1. does this mean he’d send Neil Young and Stana Katic back?

    but he’d probably keep Celine Dion and Justin Bieber…

  2. I’m sure he’d return Michael J Fox, because healthcare costs. Can we return Scotty to his parents, with instructions to either educate him or lock him up permanently? Did the Kochs truly think they could send him out of Wisconsin and he would come off as a human being? I think the boys are getting dementia.

  3. Here’s an idea….forget the walls, let’s just place a big dome over top of the entire country! It will help the Republicans keep all the stupid fresh, and Scotland will never again have to look at Trump’s smug, orange face.

    Well, it works out for the Scottish, at least.

  4. I’m sure Melissa Ethridge would be on the top of his list too!

    (she had a baby with her wife, seeded by David Crosby of Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young)

  5. “Or maybe Walker is anticipating that Americans will flee in droves if he is elected, and the wall is part of his plan to counter this…”

    It makes no sense to build the wall NOW because, American troops will have to invade Canada for it’s tar sands someday…

  6. …Weasel Kochsucker was born to disappoint…I don’t think his PARENTS are happy with how he turned out…I’ve talked to Teatards right here in Madison who cannot believe how stupid Weasel Scott Kochsucker has become…they haven’t given up on him…yet…
    …I don’t believe Weasel can withstand another election challenge…

  7. OK, since when did Canada invade us? I thought most Canadians are nice and friendly and would give us poutine…. and crazy ass recipes that involve bacon and poutine.

    There’s no need for a wall between the US and Canada. What good would that do?

  8. Walker is an uneducated idiot, which the people of Wisconsin should know by now. He’s certainly damaged their state enough. Let’s not let him get into position to damage the rest of the U.S. with his inane and incompetent Koch-fueled notions. Anyone who votes for Walker for any elected office is an absolute fool.

  9. It still boggles my mind that he was reelected. Didn’t Wisconsin voters see what he’d already done to their state? Anyone that listens to him for more than five minutes should get the understanding that he has no idea what he’s talking about. It’s obvious that his policies are nothing more than repeating what the Koch brothers told him to say. When asked to explain, he’s lost.

  10. Walker is right but he hasn’t gone far enough. What about illegals arriving by boat? We need to build a fifty foot high wall along the entire coastline. This would have the added benefit of blocking storm surges and the rising waters due to climate change. Merica, hell yeah.

  11. The Canadians know out tea bag/repubs are CRAZY LUNITICS and want us to build this wall to keep THEM out.

    Our ignorant, uneducated tea bag/repubs make us all look really stupid.

    Read the comments, the Canadians HATE them and believe they have a mental condition…WE KNOW THIS.
    Some comments are about US citizen going across the border to get MEDICAL TREATMENTS and they are sick of it.
    They know we’re a gun toting violant country.

  12. There are already fortifications on the Canadian side of the Great Lakes, in fact. They were built back in the 1800’s when Canada was ready to repel any American invasion. There are several forts along the shores of Lake Ontario and you can visit them today, and watch college kids recreate the activities of the soldiers of the past, with Fort Henry in Kingston ON being the largest.

  13. This is the value of a college education that Snot Walker doesn’t understand. It gives a person the ability to think on their feet and to sound intelligent when answering a question. It teaches a person critical thinking skills which allows them to consider whether their position makes sense or not. And it creates an intellectual curiosity that allows for new information and thinking patterns.

    Unless your name is Ted Cruz of course. That Harvard education was totally wasted on him.

  14. WooHoo!! PoliticusUSA just got mentioned on MSNBC’s The Last Word. Alex Wagner is hosting tonight and on the subject of Scott Walker & his wall to the north, they showed the caption title together with the PoliticusUSA of this exact story!!

  15. Someone mentioned this already. But this article’s title was featured on The Last Word tonight. Since I read here every day I thought that was pretty cool!

  16. I used to live in Bangor Maine, when I was stationed there with the Strategic Air Command.
    For fun we’d drive up to Canada for a weekend diversion from time to time.
    I was absolutely appalled at the number of moose and black bear that would freely walk back and forth across our border! Who did they think they were, anyway? Dark and brooding and dangerous to approach, they were not welcome in my country!

  17. I’m really looking forward to seeing how Scotty plans on “floating” a fence on Lakes Superior, Huron, Erie and Ontario.

    Not to mention how he plans to “fence” the joined towns of Derby Vermont and Stanstead Quebec, where the border runs right through the middle of the Haskell Free Library and a number of other buildings, half of each on the US and Canadian sides.

    Better yet, in this economy, I wonder where he plans to get the money to build it. Canada is apparently in a recession so they won’t be paying for it.

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