Trump Puts Michele Bachmann on his Evangelical Advisory Board

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Every Democrat remembers crazy Michele Bachmann. Now she will join her craziness to the insanity of Donald J. Trump as Trump assembles a “Evangelical Executive Advisory Board,” which includes not only ex-Rep. Michele Bachmann, but Focus on the Family founder James Dobson and televangelist Kenneth Copeland.

Copeland is a remarkable choice because he proclaimed that God told him Ted Cruz would be president. But hey, if ever a campaign was tailor made to be welcoming of false prophets, it was Trump’s.

Trump said, in selecting these people,

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“I have such tremendous respect and admiration for this group and I look forward to continuing to talk about the issues important to Evangelicals, and all Americans, and the common sense solutions I will implement when I am President.”

Oh dear. Yes. With such delusions, they’re going to get along together really well.

Bachmann, whom Trump ranks as “wise counsel,” is an interesting choice as well. Trump likes to refer to Clinton as “Crooked Hillary” and accuse her of all sorts of crimes, while Bachmann, you will remember, was forced to leave Congress because of a campaign scandal.

Trump makes hay with the FBI and Hillary Clinton’s emails, but we can point to Michele Bachmann being under FBI investigation for several federal crimes, even while she was calling President Obama “lawless.”

Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington (CREW) put Bachmann on their list of the Most Corrupt Members of Congress, but it is unlikely Trump will call her any bad names, figuring she will bring a few votes with her.

This decision to form an evangelical advisory group shows that Trump seems to have decided to redouble his efforts among the only constituency still likely to vote for him, now that he has eliminated anyone darker-skinned than Ted Nugent.

Bachmann is certainly a canny choice if he’s looking for the more disturbed among Fox News’ “white Christian American” demographic. After all, look at some of Bachmann’s past gems:

There was 2015’s “Jesus is Coming Soon” and it’s Time to Convert the Jews. This is sure to resonate with all those anti-Semitic white supremacists flocking around Trump.

If that’s not to their taste, how about the time she said God will do us like Sodom? That’s a winner for sure. The Religious Right has proven it cannot function without the fantastical threat of our immanent demise at the hands of a wrathful lord.

Certainly one moment that epitomizes her time in Congress is when she said she wanted Obama spanked and his “perpetual magic wand” taken away. This all sorts of creepy statement is something that could have come straight out of Trump’s mouth.

One of my personal favorites is from 2014 when in time for Christmas, Bachmann managed to get both Bible and Constitution wrong in her final speech.

There is a certain satisfying symmetry to her career in Congress, Mendacious Michele coming in a liar and going out the same way, in a blaze of brazen dishonesty.

This is the same Michele Bachmann who told Bill O’Reilly that the Obama administration “lives in a fantasy world.”

James Dobson will also be a nice fit for Trump. He’s the guy who said Sandy Hook was God’s judgment on America. This is sure to sit well with the NRA crowd, as it gives them something to point to besides their AR-15 Penis Substitutes.

Hey, wait a minute, somebody get David Barton on the phone! Didn’t Bachmann already say 9/11 was God’ judgment on America? How many judgments do we need?

What about the Bible-inspired Constitution’s Fifth Amendment “Double Jeopardy Clause”? – “nor shall any person be subject for the same offence to be twice put in jeopardy of life or limb.” And weren’t we told Hurricane Katrina was also God’s judgment on America?

Dobson is also the guy who rationalized away Obama’s victory in 2012 by saying God had apparently decided he could make use of Obama. Trump may like the votes Dobson represents, and he’s sure to represent a few, because CRAZY, but we can all rest assured that in January 2017, Dobson will be rationalizing Clinton’s victory in the same way, by saying God had decided he had a use for Hillary. The Religious Right’s version of Christianity is nothing if not flexible.

We can’t step away without looking Kenneth Copeland. As PFAW’s Brian Tashman writes,

Like Trump, Copeland has been implicated in financial scandals and preaches against vaccines, which may have been a reason that one of his churches suffered a measles outbreak.

Tashman also reminds us that Copeland “claims the ability to cure PTSD” – but didn’t David Barton assure us that the Bible (Numbers 32) rules out Posttraumatic Stress Disorder, or PTSD? If that’s not enough, Copeland says he can cure Ebola too.

Increasingly, the 2016 Election Cycle is becoming less a struggle between Republicans and Democrats, but crazy people and sane people. Trump has shown quite clearly where he stands, by attaching not only haters of all stripes, but every stray lunatic he can to his cause. It doesn’t matter that all their messages conflict and contradict, because not only is Trump’s rhetoric, but the Bible itself, full of contradictions.

Here is the list of people Trump has put on his board. Notice another name that says corruption: former Republican kingmaker Ralph Reed, the guy who invokes MLK’s fight for freedom in his right to oppress.

Michele Bachmann – Former Congresswoman
A.R. Bernard – Senior Pastor and CEO, Christian Cultural Center
Mark Burns – Pastor, Harvest Praise and Worship Center
Tim Clinton – President, American Association of Christian Counselors
Kenneth and Gloria Copeland – Founders, Kenneth Copeland Ministries
James Dobson – Author, Psychologist and Host, My Family Talk
Jerry Falwell, Jr. – President, Liberty University
Ronnie Floyd – Senior Pastor, Cross Church
Jentezen Franklin – Senior Pastor, Free Chapel
Jack Graham – Senior Pastor, Prestonwood Baptist Church
Harry Jackson – Senior Pastor, Hope Christian Church
Robert Jeffress – Senior Pastor, First Baptist Church of Dallas
David Jeremiah – Senior Pastor, Shadow Mountain Community Church
Richard Land – President, Southern Evangelical Seminary
James MacDonald – Founder and Senior Pastor, Harvest Bible Chapel
Johnnie Moore – Author, President of The KAIROS Company
Robert Morris – Senior Pastor, Gateway Church
Tom Mullins – Senior Pastor, Christ Fellowship­
Ralph Reed – Founder, Faith and Freedom Coalition
James Robison – Founder, Life OUTREACH International
Tony Suarez – Executive Vice President, National Hispanic Christian Leadership Conference
Jay Strack – President, Student Leadership University
Paula White – Senior Pastor, New Destiny Christian Center
Tom Winters – Attorney, Winters and King, Inc.
Sealy Yates – Attorney, Yates and Yates

Conservatives are conditioned to live with contradictions. It is an ideology where multiple realities can co-exist even if they cannot all be true. Where reason and logic and worse, science, have ceased to hold sway, we descend into a realm of magic, where the laws of the universe are lost to a murky belief that what they want takes precedence over what is.

Many of them hauled kicking and screaming to the altar (like Copeland), these crazies may have found the perfect candidate in Donald Trump. He has certainly found the perfect advisers in Michele Bachmann.