This weekend, 10 to 30 million patriotic Americans were supposed to descend on Washington, D.C. and take back America from the Marxist regime of President Obama. The plan was to have millions ‘peacefully’ demonstrate for three days. After the demonstration was over, one million people would then stay in Washington and force the non-Tea Party elected officials in D.C, starting with the President, to resign from office. At that point, tribunals led by the likes of Ted Cruz, Rand Paul, Allen West, Jim DeMint and Mike Lee would convene and conduct investigations, while the new Congress, consisting of only like-minded individuals, would appoint a new President and replacements of those who were removed from office.
Hrafnkell Haraldsson already covered the unmitigated disaster that was the Operation American Spring weekend protest. At best, a few hundred individuals appeared this weekend for the rally. Of the few that did show up, many were true zealots and lunatics hoping to get noticed. Hrafnkell did a great job providing the names of some of the crazies that made appearances and what they hoped to accomplish this weekend.
Ford Fischer, of News2Share, was in Washington this weekend and provided raw footage of the so-called ‘massive protest.’ As you can see in the 20+ minute video, the rally was an extremely small, disorganized affair. Of course, the people that showed up fit within certain demographics that you’d associate with this type of rally.
On Twitter, the hashtag #AmericanSpringexcuses took off. People have tried to outdo each other over the past two days in coming up with the funniest excuses used by Tea Partiers for not attending the rally this weekend. Below is a collection of some of the best ones I found:
#AmericanSpringExcuses Drone hustling, shape-shifting Socialist/Kenyan dictators don’t scare me…but that clammy drizzle was too much!
— John Sheehan (@dogstar7tweets) May 17, 2014
#AmericanSpringExcuses Hold on, I have to listen to FOX to find out how it’s Obama’s fault.
— Mad Yellow Dog (@MadYellowDog) May 17, 2014
#americanspringexcuses Put the hood on backwards, ran into tree, which was put there by liberal fascist socialist dictators.
— Dystopia Now (@damspahn) May 17, 2014
#AmericanSpringExcuses We changed plans when we heard that the image of Jesus appeared on an English muffin at a diner in Toledo
— Harold Itzkowitz (@HaroldItz) May 17, 2014
#AmericanSpringexcuses As they drove toward downtown, the sign read, “Washington Left”… so they went home.
— AverageChirps (@AverageChirps) May 17, 2014
Somebody told me that black people live in DC and I got scared. #Americanspringexcuses
— Keith Brekhus (@KeithBrekhus) May 17, 2014
Pending hate crime trial precludes travel outside the state. #AmericanSpringexcuses
— OppressedProgressive (@OpressedProgess) May 17, 2014
#AmericanSpringexcuses I was going to make sign last Sunday but Hobby Lobby was closed. #OperationAmericanSpring
— Matty Ice (@MattyIceAZ) May 17, 2014
Already had tickets to Monster Truck Rally #AmericanSpringExcuses
— Blue DuPage (@BlueDuPage) May 17, 2014
Too busy feeding and watering Cliven Bundy cows #AmericanSpringexcuses
— Benny vessey (@Bennyvessey) May 16, 2014
Walmart couldn’t let ALL its greeters have the day off. #AmericanSpringexcuses
— Allan Brauer (@allanbrauer) May 16, 2014
#AmericanSpringExcuses Couldn’t go because I had to renew my Viagra prescription #OperationAmericanSpring
— Deb Vermaas (@debv219) May 16, 2014
Refuse to recognize federal government, and #DC isn’t state. Worried I would legitimize feds if I showed up. #AmericanSpringExcuses
— Dave Silverstone (@dwsNY) May 17, 2014
Knew librul media wouldn’t cover it, so didn’t bother going. Now look! They didn’t cover it! #AmericanSpringExcuses
— Dave Silverstone (@dwsNY) May 17, 2014
#AmericanSpringexcuses Had to drive by myself. Ran out of Jack Daniels on the Interstate and passed out on the shoulder
— Herbert (@HHooversGhost) May 17, 2014
There were hundreds more just like these, almost all nearly as funny and witty. The epic fail that was Operation American Spring gave liberals and progressives ample opportunity to rub the Tea Party’s nose in it.
Justin Baragona is the Managing Editor at Politicus Sports as well as Senior Editor at PoliticusUSA. He was a political writer for 411Mania.com before joining PoliticusUSA. Politically, Justin considers himself a liberal but also a realist and pragmatist. Currently, Justin lives in St. Louis, MO and is married. Besides writing, he also runs his own business after spending a number of years in the corporate world. You can follow Justin on Twitter either with his personal handle (@justinbaragona) or the Sports site’s (@PoliticusSports).
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