Glenn Beck Claims God Spoke to His 8-28 Rally with Flying Geese

Do you remember when Glenn Beck promised a miracle from God at his 8-28 rally? On his Fox News program today Beck unveiled the power of the Lord through flying geese. A flyover by some geese is what Beck is citing as his miracle. Beck called it “God’s flyover.”

Here is the video courtesy of Media Matters:

Beck said, “I want to show you first that miracle that happened at 10:59. There are several versions of this, or at 9:59. There are several versions of what was happening. Do we have the videotape? At 9:59, what happened was there was a flock of geese. It was a flyover if you will. Somebody caught it on tape. Here’s the flyover. This was happening just as the opening music was starting. We wanted to have a flyover, but you can’t flyover in the District of Columbia. It was perfect coordination and perfect timing. Coincidence? Maybe? I think it was God’s flyover. It was not supposed to happen. We couldn’t get a flyover. We couldn’t even get anybody dressed in a military uniform to present the flag. We tried for almost a year. We couldn’t get it done. Thank God, we had our flyover.”

Beck is calling it a miracle that a flock of geese flew over an outdoor rally at the exact time that the rally was starting. If this is the best miracle that God could offer Beck, then he/she really must not think much of Beck and his cause. I would expect so much more from God than migratory bird pattern. Some geese flew over my house on Saturday too, so I guess everybody got a miracle. It could have been a miracle, or it could have been a FLOCK of FREAKING GEESE. They were outside. You know, where the birds fly. I don’t think this was all that big of strange and mysterious ways kind of thing.

You know Beck’s rally was a giant bomb, when he had to rely on Geese as his proof of God’s blessing. I wonder if it still would have been a miracle if the geese had flown overhead at 10:05, or maybe 10:17. Sadly, the crowd seemed to get more excited for the geese, than any of the actual human speakers. By the time Beck gave his speech, people were bored and leaving. The geese were the highlight of the whole morning.

Also if you look at the Zapruderesque geese footage, you see lots of green grass around the rally attendees. There seems to be plenty of room to move around. This certainly doesn’t seem like 300,000-500,000 or even a million people were there. It appears that Glenn Beck provided evidence on his own show that debunked his exaggerated rally attendance estimate. Glenn Beck has gotten so desperate that he is using random birds as proof of God’s stamp of approval. If this was God’s thumbs up then it seems that much like the rest of America God had little interest in the showboating of Sarah Palin and Glenn Beck.

At least now we know why Beck was rocking the Kevlar, damn socialist, community organizing, Obama geese.

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39 Replies to “Glenn Beck Claims God Spoke to His 8-28 Rally with Flying Geese”

  1. Beck’s a Pagan? Historically, we take omens from the flight of birds, etc. I didn’t realize there was Christian bird augury. Interesting!

  2. OMFG! LMAO!!!
    The Magikal Geese flyover my house 2 times a day! I always thought a blessing, love to hear the gaggle of geese but I never knew they were communicating with me in THAT way!!!!!
    And ya know, they don’t really have a time schedule…in the morning and after dusk….I will have to pay more attention to them now….!
    I will let ya know what the gaggle of geese say to me! :D

  3. The Great Goose Miracle of 8 28! Of course! This was predicted in the bible. I want to point out that God loves the Right best, in terms of fowl. From the chicken lady to Palin’s quitting speech, fowl has a central theme in Right.

    We can’t deny it, folks. God has spoken and he loves Glenn. SQUAWK!

  4. When science is pushed into the trash this is the only thing these people can fall back on. Did anyone ask how often geese use the mall to feed in the late summer… if you live there you know it a lot…

  5. A real miracle would have been for them to be penguins flying backwards. Now that would get me to think twice. If there God can only present geese in an area where geese exist and feed then I say there God is weak.

  6. Who could ever forget the fowl miracle of — “Our Benevolent Lady Governor Pardons One Alaskan Turkey and Engages in Sprightly Discourse With TV Reporter” — whilst other less worthy, presumably more sinful turkeys go head first into a turkey-chipper operated by a grinning, bloody butcher named Cletus, Angus, or Jim-Bob, also, too, caught on camera over Her Most Benevolent Shoulder.

    The geese in D.C. should be damned grateful for the true miracle of flight over the heads of prophets such as these. Yea. Verily.

  7. alright, this sint going to be easy for me being an atheist and all, but yesterday I had an experience with god too. Every sunday I bbq 4 large sirloins to eat the rest of the week, you know, half a steak a day.

    Here in Tennessee we have HUGE turkey vultures. As I was standing by my bbq watching the steaks, a large white wet substance landed on my shoulder. I looked up. The vulture was so high up I could hardly see him. It had to be a sign from god.

    And I thanked god that I had my garden hose right next to me .

    PS: the steaks escaped the bombardment

  8. Therefore, Beck wore body armor because of ballistic bird shit.
    Would have been a bewtter way to end it, Just saying.

  9. Don’t like to comment twice, but there’s a French proverb here that seems more than apt:

    “It is a really stupid goose that listens to the Fox preach”.

  10. Shiva, your food escaped the foul, truly a miracle!

    Now we know why GlenDuh was wearing body armor…INCOMING!

  11. It’s interesting that Glenn’s fans who are defending his Kevlar have not flocked to this post in righteous defense of his geese.

    Did Glenn get goosed by God? Did Glenn’s fans get goosed by Glenn? Did the geese get goosed by Glenn and his fans? —- Deep spiritual and ethical questions which deserve an answer from true goose believers.

    HONK if you love Glenn.

  12. OMG !!!! I didn’t know the Trinity was Jesus, God, and the Holy Goose !!!
    (I have aluminum foil goose droppings for sale in pendant and ear ring stud styles. Send me $87.00 via “Paypal”! Be among the first to wear this holy symbol!)

  13. “We couldn’t even get anybody dressed in a military uniform to present the flag. We tried for almost a year. We couldn’t get it done. Thank God, we had our flyover.”–The Beckster, lying his ass off.

    I could get a VFW Hall or a costume shop to provide someone dressed in a military uniform to present the flag by tomorrow. Thursday at the latest. Instead of relying upon God, I’d use a phone book or Google or or just visit my local VFW hall and ask the guys playing bingo if they’d like to present the flag in Washington DC at a televised event on a Saturday. It’s not the hardest thing in the world, unless you are Glenn Beck.

  14. I wonder if even the military realized that they were being scammed by Glenn Beck. If Beck had wanted I’m sure there could have been any amount of military members there that he wanted. But that would have made it real

  15. Another blatant example of: 1) the low opinion Beck has of the intelligence of his fans and, 2) his rock-solid faith in their gullibility.

  16. From all the remarks I read you are all living on the fringes of all the good real americans that take honor in this country, you will be the first to bitch when we loose it all, and it is comeing. I hope none of you are in the same foxhole with me when it comes time to fight the enemy, It might be confusing who the enemy really is. I pity people that have a verry little thought prosess, I never said I feel sorry, I pitty….

  17. You people who hate Glenn Beck. Would you prefer it better if Beck had said, ” the bird flyover was just happenstance”? I think you would still find fault with him somehow as he is asking you to raise your standards and defend America. I don’t think you have the moral courage to be humble. But, I promise you atheists this. You may no find you path to God, but He will find You. Come on guys. Stand for the values that built our country that gave you so many rights to drive the BMW, bitching, moaning and whining.
    Ex-para/medic 101st Vietnam.

  18. Haha, no, not the biggest slam…Beck has said and done so many ridiculous things, just go read some of the other posts about him and the comments underneath them. Biggest slam, hahahah.

  19. I live in DC and can tell you, with the constant seeding of the Mall in late summer and the endless throngs of tourists throwing food on the ground, Canadian Geese are as common in the District as unwed teenage mothers are in Sarah Palin’s house. Not to mention the fact that they love to wade in the reflecting pool. Looks to me as if those geese knew exactly when to leave the scene; before the lunacy began. I’m surprised somebody from THAT crowd didn’t pull out a shotgun and try to bag lunch.

  20. “We tried for a year to get a person in a military uniform to present a flag” and couldn’t get it done” Seriously, Now how full of crap is that?

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