Republicans Say Stomachs Connect to Vaginas and that Cancer is a Fungus


This week in Republican medicine: A woman’s stomach is connected directly to the vagina, and cancer is a fungus you can flush out with baking soda.

This is the appalling state of affairs in the Republican Party where our healthcare is debated.

Now I want you to pause right here, before we go into the details, and realize that David Lane, the Martin Bormann of the Religious Right, the guy behind the AFA’s hate-trip to Israel with the RNC, says that,


“We have forgotten God and our godly forefathers. We have allowed a holocaust in America and the government defiling God’s design for our sexuality.”

You mean, like that whole stomach-to-vagina connection God apparently came up with?

And Rick Wiles sat down with another conservative pastor, Laurence White, who complained that,

“They’re trying to make conservative, Bible-believing candidates look foolish because the Devil is the Father of Lies and he’s good at it.”

Oh gosh, we don’t have to try. And we’re not the one’s lying.

Nevada State Assemblywoman and Cliven Bundy supporter Michele Fiore (R), who might want to worry less about fake cancer cure and more about the IRS and federal tax liens, says that,

If you have cancer, which I believe is a fungus, and we can put a pic line into your body and we’re flushing with, say, salt water, sodium cardonate ([sic] through that line and flushing out the fungus. These are some procedures that are not FDA-approved in America that are very inexpensive, cost-effective.

She wants to actually introduce legislation that would allow quackery like her baking soda “cure,” calling it the “terminally-ill bill,” though a better name would be the “terminally stupid bill.”

This is the same Fiori, by the way, who last week said,

If these young, hot little girls on campus have a firearm, I wonder how many men will want to assault them. The sexual assaults that are occurring would go down once these sexual predators get a bullet in their head.

Of course, the greater danger would probably be shooting themselves in the head, like Michigan Republican Precinct Delegate Christina Bond did when she tried to adjust her bra holster. Bond had been a military policeman, and so presumably knew how to handle a firearm. How many “young, hot little girls” can say this?

This hasn’t stopped Fiore from claiming that if you oppose her plan to arm college hotties, you are pro-rape.

With reasoning skills like this, who isn’t going to listen to her cancer advice?

And the Associated Press reported Monday that Idaho State Rep. Vito Barbieri (R) asked while the House State Affairs Committee discussed House Bill 154, which would prohibit remote chemical abortions,

“Can this same procedure be done in a pregnancy — swallowing a camera and helping the doctor determine what the situation is with the child?”

To which Dr. Julie Madsen replied, “It cannot be done in pregnancy simply because, when you swallow a pill, it would not end up in the vagina.”

No. Really?

Women with magical bodies that repel a rapist’s sperm are bad enough, but according to Barbieri, presumably, a woman could get pregnant from oral sex. And Dr. Madsen is lucky she didn’t get reprimanded for saying “vagina” like Michigan Democrat Lisa Brown back in 2012.

All the astounded Barbieri could say to this was, “Fascinating. That certainly makes sense, doctor.”

Well, glad you think so.

Of course, the committee approved the ban. The Republican Party, local, state, or national, has not met an abortion ban it does not like.

Healthcare has a lot in common with the environment, with Republicans, who know nothing about either, eager to pass legislation regarding both.

The idea in Idaho, say Republicans, is to help women. As was pointed out to them by Dr. Madsen, it actually harms them when they live in remote areas and cannot easily see a doctor.

Republicans, of course, are lying. They have no interest at all in actually helping women.

Once he had made himself a laughingstock, Barbieri pretended he knew all along:

“I was being rhetorical, because I was trying to make the point that equalizing a colonoscopy to this particular procedure was apples and oranges. So I was asking a rhetorical question that was designed to make her say that they weren’t the same thing, and she did so. It was the response I wanted.”

What a clever fellow.

We got all the responses we wanted too. Remember, Rand Paul is a doctor (or so he claims), and a whole slew of Republican doctors ran for Congress in the midterms. The New York Times reported in 2011 that doctors were leaving the Republican Party for the Democrat, but there are apparently enough of them still out there that you need to beware.

My advice: before you let a doctor touch you, find out what his politics are.

Photo from Wikipedia

37 Replies to “Republicans Say Stomachs Connect to Vaginas and that Cancer is a Fungus”

  1. The only time I ever agreed with “Bobby” Jindal was when he exhorted the GOPers to stop being the stupid party. But repubes, being repubes, ignored his advice and became even more stupid, and he gleefully followed them into a morass of stupidity that they’ll never escape.

  2. My husband had a PICC line for several months last year. A PICC line is NOT something that is casually done. A PICC line is inserted into the heart
    Between the Visiting Nurses (who have to change the dressing in a sterile environment) and myself (who had to learn how to flush the lines, prepare the ‘mixture’, moniter the pump etc), it was difficult to say the least.
    And BTW, it is very expensive.

  3. I think this woman may have taken one too many to the head. Shes crazy. Who believes what these nut jobs say?

  4. First question, By how many votes did these assholes won? Why aren’t the media putting a spotlight on the people who voted for these derelicts?

    Bottomline: This said more about the people who put them in the position of authority. Cause I’m pretty sure he was a dick-in-the-box before he got elected.

  5. Republicans are the cancer on any fungus. In scientific matters as it pertains to policy any dumbass Republican immediately becomes the expert over a learned expert in that particular field. The Reich Wing simply refuses to believe in science and even go so far as to make up their own “science” to attempt legitimacy.

  6. I watched Barbieri on the local fox “news” station. It was what you would expect. The interviewers pitched marshmallows and he tossed word salad drenched in convoluted logic at the TV audience. I’m sure that the audience bought it hook line and sinker, but this is Idaho which somehow got moved from the deep red south to the northwest. And here we are – living in the 1800’s…

  7. The stomach is connected to your intestines, gallbladder, and pancreas. All aide in digestion of food. They make up your digestive system, along with your mouth, tongue, and esophagus!
    The vagina is a part of a females reproductive system, whose function is to help reproduce; to help sustain a pregnancy, induce labor, and nurse a baby if the mother desires to.
    What’s so sad is people will actually think he is correct, when he is not a physician of any kind. This is pathetic.

  8. Politicians, believeing they are medically knowledgeable enough to make decisions about and for women without even knowing! These people of little minds think they can heal from a distance, have no right to effect religious laws into being. Repeated and constant referencing to “God” in their speeches, proves they are out to create their own Theocratic nation here in the USA! Our nation was founded on the principle of separation of “church and state.” Wake up America, and oust these religious zealots tearing down our nation! – “There is not one redeeming feature in our superstition of Christianity. It has made one half the world fools, and the other half hypocrites.”- Thomas Jefferson

  9. Has Evangelical home schooling been around this long or were they so dumb from the beginning that they slept thru science classes? Puberty alone should make them want to ask questions about their body! Guess we can thank science/internet for showing us how many stupid people we really have in this country! Sad!

  10. To be fair, I have always thought Republicans were a**holes, and that the Tea Party is a cancer.
    Does that make me like them?

  11. Whats next from these morons. Use leaches to treat blood cancer?? Drink Drano for a laxative?? Talk about living in the dark ages. Unbelievable.

  12. Under the Thirteenth Amendment, children can’t be property. Under the Fourteenth, they are entitled to the equal protection of the laws, including those mandating that they be provided by their caregivers with adequate food, shelter, clothing, and (dare I say it) education.

  13. Repuge men know the least about the female anatomy, humans, and science than any other group on earth. Sympathy goes to their wives.

  14. Once again, social conservatives are demonstrating their unwillingness to do their homework before taking a stand on important policy positions affecting so many Americans.
    Lord knows we don’t want our legislators to be informed about the fundamentals of human biology and medical treatments when creating legislation that could negatively impact the emotional and physical health of oncology patients.

    And we certainly don’t want our national leaders to be eloquent, scientifically literate, and generally well-informed about the world in which we live. Much better to derive scientific theories based on the cherry-picked passages taken from the Bible and to formulate public policy based on the rumors, gossip, and unverified anecdotal accounts taken from online blogs.

  15. i am too old to take up the banner of saving freedom. there has to be people out there who are not stupid. who will know those right wing churches with crosses hung on them are not Gods houses . they are places to plot to scheme to do things to hurt good people & they need to be taken down. night after night all over america for every one that is taken down america is that much also know how these church men compare themselves to moses they are laughing at you moses was a child murderer & molester read in old testament numbers chapter 31 .please save our country from those filthy men & their slut wives.

  16. Well, the GOPers know this much: babies come from mommy’s stomach when god gives them a baby. So if babies come from mommy’s stomach, why wouldn’t a camera swallowed into the stomach be the same as a gynecological exam? [WINK]

  17. Quick somebody make Vito Barbieri and Michele Fiore swallow cameras and see if we can find their brains. If it is anywhere, my guess is it will be just before the camera pops out the other end.

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