Mitch McConnell goes bumper sticker slogan and dogs to avoid talking about his secretive policy agenda.
Here’s one way to get around the fact that you have nothing to say, thereby exposing the fact that you have nothing to say. You say nothing about yourself, save for a bumper sticker slogan at the end.
It’s Mitch McConnell for the “win”, aka, “I got nothing.”
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Watch the new McConnell ad entitled “Commercials” here, which will be released Tuesday:
“A lot of people tell me how to do my commercials,” Mitch announces, happily avoiding policy talk by moving the goal post way past the women whom he doesn’t represent and the policy agenda he has refused to tell voters about until after the election.
The commercial continues as a silly ad man tries to get Mitch to stand between two trucks or talk to a baby in order to avoid talking policy, but Mitch wasn’t having any of that. “That sounds dangerous,” he wisely intones about the first. An ad with bloodhounds is pitched next, but your clever Senator, who doesn’t think bringing jobs to Kentucky is part of his job, isn’t sold on this idea.
Then, to the genius. How about a bumper sticker instead!? No policy, just feel good stuff! “Maybe it’s enough to say ‘Mitch fights for Kentucky’,” the ad man says. So we get a picture of a smiling Mitch McConnell in the halls where he does his hardest work obstructing Obama. Yes, best not get into the hows of how Mitch fights for Kentucky..
… Especially based on this vague Mitch pitch from his campaign site – still fighting Obamacare even though his state loves Kynect and also, Rand Paul endorsed him (not sure this is a positive but okay):
So, that’s no to jobs and no to Kynect (a spokesperson finally admitted McConnell wants to gut the entire thing), but super heart-warming slogan. But the Senator earns kudos on keeping mum about privatizing Social Security, proving that he is not foolish enough to tell voters about the Republican agenda.
We end with “friendly” Mitch, laughing as the earlier dogs surround him. Hey, remember when dogs got Mitch elected? That was in 1984. Watch here and try to contain your mirth as the man “looks” for an allegedly MIA lawmaker- almost like he’s looking for Mitch now:
I’m Mitch McConnell and thirty years later, I still have nothing to say to you voters, so here are some cute dogs and a bumper sticker. Can I get a win for nostalgia?
This is so much better than using a woman from Pennsylvania as a Kentucky woman who feels “represented” by McConnell in an for his Kentucky Senate seat. Booyah!
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