Louie Gohmert: It’s Obama’s Fault We’re all Idiots

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Oh sweet little six-and-a-half-pound rifle-totin’ government hatin’ baby Jesus. Florida Governor Rick Scott has taken the “Thanks, Obama!” meme to a whole ‘nother level by blaming President Obama and hospitals for his massive suckage factor.

As an editorial in the Tampa Bay Times tells us, “Rick Scott is all about avoiding responsibility and blaming others.”

But that’s not the craziest news recently, believe it or not. And whatever Scott’s got, it’s not limited to Florida. In fact, to judge by recent outbursts from people like Greg Abbott and Ted Cruz and Louie Gohmert, it may have come to Florida by way of Texas.

We saw Tuesday how Texas Republican Louie Gohmert jumped on the Jade Helm 15 conspiracy bandwagon. But it turns out it’s not Gohmert’s fault he’s an idiot. It’s Obama’s.

He said it’s all because Obama picked on nuns.

Gohmert’s “logic” began with the Little Sisters of the Poor not wanting to sign a Obamacare birth control waiver because God doesn’t allow Obamacare waiver signing, apparently (I missed that passage in the Bible). At least, that is what he told right wing hate group leader Tony Perkins on Washington Watch Wednesday:

From this administration’s standpoint, if you’re a saintly nun that has dedicated your life to helping the helpless, well, we’ve got to sue you and force you into our program, forget your religious beliefs, we’re coming after you. This is the kind of thing this administration does, they help make people concerned about their government.

Apparently, a bunch of deranged nuns saying “God tells them not to” sign a waiver makes people distrust the federal government.

I think it’s more likely that a bunch of racist white folks with AR-15s distrust the government because a black man is living in a white house:

IMG_20150507_163402 (2)

If you’re still not connecting the dots here, Gohmert then takes you to the Posse Comitatus Act, which led him to the 1993 Waco incident.

The Posse Comitatus Act (18 U.S.C. § 1385, original at 20 Stat. 152) of 1878, you might remember, placed limits on the use of federal troops to keep law and order, unless directed by the President or by Congress. This ultimately made it easier for white folks to terrorize blacks without interference.

Whoever, except in cases and under circumstances expressly authorized by the Constitution or Act of Congress, willfully uses any part of the Army or the Air Force as a posse comitatus or otherwise to execute the laws shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than two years, or both.

-Title 18, U.S. Code, Section 1385

The Waco incident centered on the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms raid on the Branch Davidian compound on February 28, 1993, which resulted in four dead ATF agents, six dead Branch Davidians, and a 51-day siege followed by an all-out assault that killed 76 people.

So to review this exercise in Gohmertian Logic:

Little Sisters of the Poor –> Posse Comitatus Act –> Waco –> Jade Helm 15.

Got that yet?

Now there is a common thread here: the Little Sisters of the Poor is a Catholic organization and Spanish people tend to be Catholics and a lot of Spanish people emigrated to Central America and a lot of Central Americans have emigrated to Texas, a place where white folks benefitted immensely from Yankee troops going home so they could beat up, lynch, and otherwise terrorize helpless black folks, and where lunatic David Koresh stockpiled an arsenal that allowed him to face down the ATF and the federal government, all of which seems to somehow inspire other lunatics like Louie Gohmert to think the federal government maybe wants some payback from Texas?

Hey, don’t blame me. I’m just trying to make sense of it all, because frankly, this is some kooky sh*t. If you’ve got a better explanation, roll it out in the comments below.

We shamelessly tease these people because they are idiots:

Stewart_jadehelm

But they are so serious about it:

kelly-jade-helm

And,

Troops_Infiltrate

As just two examples.

Which only makes it all that much funnier – and embarrassing. In fact, Texas is such an embarrassment at this point that I doubt we could give it away. After all, what advanced nation would want a big chunk of 13th century dragging them down?

What Texas needs, as I’m sure President Obama understands, is not federal intervention, but psychiatric intervention on a large scale, something that would make the Berlin Airlift look like child’s play by comparison.

Unfortunately, though the government has apparently figured out how to turn people gay, it hasn’t figured out how to turn people smart.

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49 Replies to “Louie Gohmert: It’s Obama’s Fault We’re all Idiots”

  1. Double H, don’t forget the charge the Right often repeat about foreign troops on American soil which include African soldiers with bones in their noses and spears in hand.

    This little rumor got started in the 1960’s and was parroted in Conservative publications.

  2. There is so much it would take a book. It’s a bit overwhelming when Donald Trump comes down on Pamela Geller, you know? It’s a lot to deal with!

  3. Gohmert you were an idiot long before Obama became President. Actually the whole GOP political wing has gone nuts. The Department of Mental Health & Hygiene needs to start some research and treatment programs to find out what you all have been eating and drinking that has made you all go off the rails.

  4. So Gohmert, Perry, Abbott and other loons are saying that Pres. Obama is going to use Jade Helm 15 to round up right-wing dissidents.

    Well, what I want to know is where are all the FEMA camps holding the dissidents rounded up in Jade Helm 1 thru 14?!?

    [wink]

  5. I love how you think and how you write!

    Texas truly is the craziest state in our country. When you combine that with the dumbass lunatic pols, to paraphrase, it is “Texas, we have a problem”.

  6. Little Sisters of the Poor –> Posse Comitatus Act –> Waco –> Jade Helm 15.

    Got that yet?

    I’ve tried, I can’t. It’s probably because I can’t bend over that far.

  7. That loud noise you just heard was Sam Houston turning over in his grave.
    He was against Texas seceding with the rest of the slavery-led South in the first place.
    Now there are crazy’s like ex-governor Rick Perry talking secession again and current governor Greg Abbott calling out the militia.
    Now the headline, “Fort Sumner has been fired upon” will be replaced by, “Bastrop fired upon.”
    Come to think of it, the crazy level in 2015 Texas is pretty close to 1865 South Carolina.

  8. We really do need to invade Texas and take it back in the name of sane SECULAR Democracy. Texas is Indeed a “whole other country”.

  9. That loud noise you just heard was Sam Houston turning over in his grave.
    He was against Texas seceding with the rest of the slavery-led South in the first place.
    Now there are crazy’s like ex-governor Rick Perry talking secession, current governor Greg Abbott calling out the militia, and “Beauregard” Gohmert growing more seditious everyday.
    Now the headline, “Fort Sumner has been fired upon” will be replaced by, “Bastrop fired upon.”
    Come to think of it, the crazy level in 2015 Texas is pretty close to 1865 South Carolina

  10. his condition was caused by inbreeding and while one can’t choose one’s relatives it hasn’t helped by his constant self abuse…

    which is also forbidden by the bible…

  11. You can’t make this stuff up. I’m not sure who’s more off the deep end, politicians like Abbott and Gohmert or the people who voted them into office. Is it the pollution from the oil companies?

  12. HH writes: “So to review this exercise in Gohmertian Logic: Little Sisters of the Poor –> Posse Comitatus Act –> Waco –> Jade Helm 15.
    Got that yet?”

    No, I do not follow. I cannot comprehend that. I guess that must make me sane. Phew.

  13. *mind explodes in sheer awe of the total stupidity involved*

    I…I… my god. There is nothing that can explain his logic. It’s so horrifying.

  14. I read somewhere the taxpayers are giving Abbott a spanking because he is wasting their money on the Tx Guard to watch the US military.

    STOP – the stupid hurts.

  15. That last image is from David Icke, the man who thinks we’re ruled by space lizards disguised as humans. That he mocks the idea of Jade Helm being only an exercise by comparing it to the Moon being made of green cheese is ironic. Icke maintains that the Moon is an artificial construct from which the Reptilians beam mind control messages to Earth. That’s even weirder than green cheese!

  16. What? Black man in the Whitehouse? What! Ok, it’s officially been renamed: Zebra Manor. Now they can be quiet.

  17. all his relatives, aunts, uncles, cousins, sisters, brothers, live in his district…

    he’s the smart one in the family…

  18. I see we have a troll who disagrees with our posts, yet they don’t have the courage to post their reason(s) for disagreeing. Maybe it’s Louie himself and President Obama is his reason. [WINK]

  19. Yep, the troll gave a thumb down to everyone, then around 11:00 they layed down for nappy time with their blankie and bottle.

  20. Hey, you Guys! Ease up on Texas, please.

    I’m still here.

    Under Democratic control, Texas used to be revered, highly respected and once considered great.

    The Republican Party has turned Texas into the laughing stock of the Nation.

    Sadly, the old saying is apparently true….

    “Everything is bigger in Texas!”

    And, boy, Cruz, Gohmert, Greg Abbott and the whole rotten Republican Party in Texas are the BIGGEST MEAN-SPIRITED, DUMBEST, EVIL FOOLS in the Nation.

    Sorry about that, Guys.

  21. think of all those military bases and ALL the federal $$$ going there and keeping the dumb f*ck state afloat, they’d have a very difficult time surviving without it.

  22. When we let the whackjobs write the textbooks, we lost Texas.

    Uneducated kids grow up, buy guns and vote. And reproduce.

  23. I agree with you Yvonne. Unfortunately, I have to also realize that it was Texans who put (and continue to put) the Republicans in power. So, I must assume they agree with those views and their representation. Otherwise, they’d be making more of an effort to get off their couches and voting them out, but I don’t see that happening. The Republicans must then be truly representing the majority of Texans. Would love to be proved wrong, but I don’t think I am, especially with the state of public education (indoctrination?) in Texas.

  24. Texas can no longer complain that it gives more than it gets from federal government.
    With an exploding population of younger, more urban and increasingly poor residents — and a state government making cuts to its already minimal spending — more Texans will rely on the federal government for basic services in the years to come.
    http://www.dallasnews.com/news/politics/headlines/20120805-texas-can-no-longer-complain-that-it-gives-more-than-it-gets-from-federal-government.ece

  25. There’s no better spokesman for idiots than Loonie Gohmert.

    The system works — Texans get what they elected — and deserve.

  26. Given that it’s been patently obvious for months that Louie Gohmert is bugfuck crazy even by Texas standards, I don’t quite understand why anyone pays any attention to what he says.

  27. You have my sympathies. I watch them do that bizarre voting abnormality, the “Primary Texas Two-Step Caucus” fiasco, and wonder why when it is always a big cluster – you know what.

    The riot squad on patrol at the voting booths!

  28. in breads… is that Wonder of Cinnamon Raisin… or is it gluten free?

    sorry.. sometimes I can’t help it…

  29. HH, your first sentence was priceless. I could picture a Southern Baptist preacher walking back and forth and the congregants wailing “Yes, Lord” in the background.

  30. I disagree, I think we should evacuate the few Dems in the state and give it up for lost! The place is overrun with zombies and there ain’t a sunflower for miles!

  31. There is no point trying to argue with crazy.

    In a pre-Regan world Louie would be in a strappy white jacket that matches the plushly padded white walls, stylish slipper socks and a gentlemanly bib collar to catch his thorazine drool while defending his asparagus.

  32. Gohmert has successfully taken over the title of “Chief Congressional Lunatic” from the outgoing Michele Bachmann.

  33. The Republicans may have Frank Luntz helping them, but all Democrats may need to do is engineer or set up more incidents like this to make them appear even crazier than they are. It will drive everyone with half a brain into the Democratic tent.

  34. Louie Gohmert is such a disgrace to Texas and a discredit to the human race, it no wonder he holds the title of America’s dumbest Congressman!

  35. Speak for yourself, Louie Gohmert!

    You all were in the state you speak of BEFORE President Obama came on the scene.

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